+ Two weeks ago, EIA reported a quote from Susan Carmon, a senior policy analyst from NEA's Center for Teaching and Learning. Ms. Carmon told the Philadelphia Inquirer: "If we cared about excellence in teaching, we'd be doing everything differently. Our organization has been as guilty as everyone else. We've been concerned about getting a warm body in the classroom." Evidently Ms. Carmon's comment was followed by a quick trip to the NEA woodshed, followed even more quickly by a letter to the Inquirer to "clarify my comments about teacher quality."

"Over the years," Ms. Carmon clarified, "standards for teachers have been raised and lowered like window blinds by state legislators, boards of education, superintendents and others who too often respond to pressing teacher shortages by filling our classrooms with unqualified personnel. The NEA believes nothing is more important than the quality of teaching in America's classrooms."

+ Because of a rather single-minded pursuit of the outcome of NEA's merger vote, EIA's reporting on the situation inside the American Federation of Teachers was erratic. This was unfortunate, because it seems there is lot more to AFT and the merger than meets the eye. Last week the media (and EIA) dutifully reported that American Federation of Teachers voted by a margin of 1,982 to 46 to approve the Principles of Unity. But wait a minute, there are three problems with that vote:

1) It was "symbolic."

2) AFT doesn't practice one person-one vote.

3) There were 3,500 delegates.

Because NEA had already voted down the Principles, AFT delegates had nothing to gain by virulent opposition. Better just to vote "aye" and avoid trouble. Second, the 46 votes against the principles could have represented a weighted vote of 460... or 4,600... or 46,000... or 460,000 — depending on which delegates from which locals voted "no." Which leads to number three: where were the other 1,500 delegates during the vote? They picked a curious time to go for coffee.

So while we have all been reporting the widespread AFT acceptance of the Principles of Unity, that support is by no means self-evident.

The NEA assembly affirmed the union's "historic commitment to the concept of unity with the AFT." The Haisman alternative, supported by 47 percent of the delegates who voted (1,500 delegates were unaccounted for during that vote as well), affirmed "NEA's historic pursuit of a single national organization of all education employees." That, my friends, is not the same thing. And AFT knows it.

+ I'm kicking myself for not finding out about it in advance, but the National School Public Relations Association held its annual convention in St. Louis last week. Over 600 education PR officials met to discuss improved communication methods. One technique is to reduce the use of education jargon (once dubbed "Educanto" by a columnist). Ellen Keao, mother of two students, needs help. "Here I am a Ph.D. student and I can't teach my son to subtract because I don't know what ‘regrouping' means," she told the St. Louis Post-Dispatch. "At each grade level they should start out the year with some sort of cheat sheet that states ‘This is what we are teaching this year and when we say this, we mean this.' "

Another parent told of her frustration. "I know what phonics is," said Lisa Hough, "but what exactly are they saying when they say whole language?"

+ In a similar vein, the state of Hawaii has designated two schools in Oahu as "student-centered" schools. What does that make the rest of them?

+ EIA is soliciting your nominations for the fuzziest textbooks, curricula and classroom materials currently in use in America's schools. You know the ones I mean — American history books without George Washington, algebra programs without algebra, reading materials consisting of video and audio tapes, etc. What makes something "fuzzy" is, of course, a subjective judgment, but I'm looking for those materials most lacking in academic rigor. Provide as much detail as possible (titles, publishers, availability). The results will be used in an upcoming EIA report.

+ Quote of the Week #1: "You ivory tower corporate types wouldn't last one day in a classroom with no bathroom breaks, a mere 30 minute bell-to-bell lunch (what would you do without your 3 martini corporate paid for unlimited lunches??) and an accountability and responsibility level few, if any, of you could handle." — From a educator's letter to EIA regarding the July 27 Forbes "Charticle" that compared teacher salaries to worker salaries.

+ Quote of the Week #2: "Thank you for your kind letter. It made me laugh so hard I spilled my three martinis all over myself. Fortunately, I had one of my many bathroom breaks coming up. I sent my Armani suit to the cleaners and charged the bill to Ivory Tower Corp. — a huge, multinational conglomerate that provides unlimited lunches to Big Business headquarters around the world. It's such a lucrative trade the company can supply all my worldly needs without any accountability or responsibility on my part." — The EIA response.

+ EIA's two 1998 reports — One Yard Below and Piles of Wealth — are available via U.S. Mail at no charge. Contact EIA at the numbers below or write EIA at PO Box 2047, Carmichael CA 95609.